Better to Have Loved and Lost…

If you’ve read me for any length of time, you’ll know what a huge fan of Wordgeyser I am.

Wordgeyser was the inaugural introductee of my feature, ‘Ladies and Gentlemen, Introducing…’.

And for good reason. I can’t help it if every time she takes pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), she waxes in a lyrical yet meaningful manner on some weighty matter of import.

Fortunately for us, she can’t help it either.

Because when we read what writers like Wordgeyser put on the page, it starts the little synapses firing. We can relate (or not). We want to share (or acknowledge). We wish to reveal (or protect).

This time it was her lovely tribute to friendship a la expat which she wrote awhile back.

She wrote eloquently: ‘In a nomadic, expat environment, friendships are stellar – they develop quickly and are intense by necessity; they burn brightly and more often than not shoot away from us when we least expect it.’

How true. Each of us knows, deep in our hearts, that we likely cannot expect such friendships to continue unabated.

The bittersweet truth is that this expat life is fraught with comings and goings.

If we are to live it to the absolute fullest, drain every lucious drop, than we must choose to give of ourselves openly and honestly. Even if it means time after time. Even when we know it will (in all likelihood) eventually hurt.

To do anything less is to close ourselves off from the rich abundance of friendship that feeds our very souls. When we do that, we threaten to become a dry, withering husk.

So while we give of ourselves and build our bonds, we must also be prepared for the inevitable news that someone (be it you, me, or another) is leaving. 

And we must accept it.

Alfred Lord Tennyson captured this in his immortal words ’tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’.

Painful. Sometimes deeply so. But true nonetheless.

We must choose to celebrate the connection: in our minds, in our hearts, in our lives.


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